When it was time for my medical and psychological clearance, I was actually excited — especially because it meant a trip to New York to meet the team at RMA of NY! From the moment I walked in, the energy was warm, welcoming, and professional. The medical staff were so friendly and personable. I genuinely loved meeting the women who would be part of this process with me.
Now listen — were there blood draws and exams? Yes. Of course. It is medical clearance after all. But not once did I feel uncomfortable or rushed. Every single person I encountered went above and beyond to check in with me and make sure I felt relaxed and at ease. Everything was done at my pace. I was never overwhelmed, never pressured — just supported. And that made all the difference.
Now let’s talk about the psychological clearance… because I had created a whole dramatic storyline in my head.
After completing the questionnaire, I just knew I was about to sit on a virtual couch while someone gently asked me if I received enough love as a child or wanted to unpack some deeply buried trauma from my relationship with my mother. (Cue the dramatic music.)
But it was nothing like that.
The meeting was simply a thoughtful check-in. It was about making sure I fully understood the decision I was making — that becoming a surrogate is a significant commitment, and that I was emotionally prepared. It wasn’t about digging into my childhood. It was about ensuring this experience would be healthy and fulfilling for me — not just a blessing for the intended parents, but for me too.
The group psychological meeting with the IPs was even smoother. By that point, we had already begun building communication — talking about delivery plans, hospital preferences, even planning a tour. I already knew how wonderful they were, I already knew when we matched that these were good hearted people who I couldn’t wait to help turn into good hearted and amazing parents. So the meeting felt less like an evaluation and more like a confirmation that we were aligned and on the same page.
Sure, at moments the process can feel like jumping through hoops. But they’re necessary hoops. Every step is designed to protect the well-being of the intended parents — and most importantly, to ensure that I am fully prepared, supported, and confident in taking on this incredible responsibility.
Looking back, I’m grateful for every appointment, every form, and every conversation. The process wasn’t intimidating — it was empowering. And it reminded me that this isn’t just an amazing task… it’s a beautiful, intentional, and well-supported experience.
And I’m so ready for it. 💛
